My wife met me at the door the other night in a sexy negligee. Unfortunately, she was just coming home.

I'm at the age where food has taken the place of sex in my life. In fact, I've just had a mirror put over my kitchen table.

My parents made a great sacrifice to make sure that we had something wonderful at Christmas, and through the help of the state and others, we were able to have a good meal.

I was a public aid recipient for about nine years as a kid, and this time of year was always tough sledding, so I just committed myself to doing something good for someone at Thanksgiving, and especially Christmas.

Work hard, be honest, help people, never give up, love your fellow man and woman, give back to society, and don't ever discriminate.

My top goal as your Secretary of State is to save lives by reducing fatal traffic crashes. When I established the Teen Driver Safety Task Force, the goal was to improve Illinois' graduated driver licensing law and, even more importantly, to save lives.

I remember when we were called 'colored,' and Dr. King would always tell young people not to get upset at what people called you. He said if it is not the name your mother gave you, then smile, keep walking, and that's exactly what we did.

In the spring of 1994 I decided not to seek reelection to the Senate. I had made the decision 12 years earlier, Christmas Day of 1982, just after I had been first elected to a full term, that I would do the best I could for a limited time.

When I went to college, my goal was to be a college history teacher. I majored in history.

In every society in human history, including the United States, those in power seek to imbue themselves with the attributes of religion and patriotism as a way of getting greater support for their policy and insulating themselves from any criticism.

My garden in England is full of eating-out places, for heat waves, warm September evenings, or lunch on a frosty Christmas morning.

Good taste is death; vulgarity is life.

The Lord's Prayer is the most perfect piece of poetry. I always feel at peace and moved when I recite it.

Risk it; go for it. Life always gives you another chance, another go at it. It's very important to take enormous risks.

I have been on a diet since 1962.

One thing I longed to do was to design a complete look, from head to toe, so I started a make-up line in 1966.

For one thing, I am still working as an adviser on fashion, design and colour and stuff.

I've always been shy, but I see that as a good thing because it kept me focused on music. When I was in seventh grade, I asked my parents for a mobile recording system for Christmas, and I got it. I didn't come out of my room for years after that. I'd get invited to the movies and I'd say, 'I'm gonna finish a couple of demos.'

When I was in seventh grade, I asked my parents for a mobile recording system for Christmas, and I got it. I didn't come out of my room for years after that. I'd get invited to the movies and I'd say, 'I'm gonna finish a couple of demos.'

Robert Duvall saw me playing at a restaurant in Louisiana and invited me to be an extra in his movie 'The Apostle.' He gave me a guitar for my sixth birthday, and I thought that was the coolest thing in the world.

Every time I take a photo, it goes into SnapSeed. Even if it's just a price tag on something, it still goes into SnapSeed, and I start editing it. I'm not a photographer, so I need all the help I can get when it comes to make a picture look cool.

I've got a lot of dreams I want to achieve, and I hope someone can cheer me on as I'll cheer them on in their dreams.

I'm very shy and awkward. I think the best thing is to embrace it. It's about accepting who you are and what you want to become and knowing all that you've got to work with, whether it's good or bad. My music was the only place I could be me for the longest time.

I struggled with feeling confident for a long time, but I think it's important to be strong and not compromise for anyone or a relationship - I'm drawn to that.

'Encore' was an experiment. 'Encore' was the second chance at a first impression. 'Encore' was not completely planned.

I believe when you meet the right person it clicks, and you both know and you start making it work, you know?

Every demo I do has a mandolin or resonator on it - some element of the bluegrass or classic country world that I grew up listening to and that first drew me in. And then I always try to find somewhere for a bluesy guitar sound, because that's also what I love. Musically, I'm always finding my way home.

I hope to focus on what I'm passionate about because I think I'd do them best job on them - education, urban education, women and children's issues and literacy.

I'm sure there were times when I wish I had thought, 'Gosh, that might really embarrass mom and dad,' but our parents didn't raise us to think about them. They're very selfless and they wanted us to have as normal of a college life as possible. So really, we didn't think of any repercussions.

As a teacher you can see the difference in kids who have parents who were involved. That difference, by the time these kids get to the third grade, is drastic.

I hope that I serve by being a teacher.

I've spent a lot of Thanksgivings on the road with my band, so anytime that I can spend Thanksgiving with my family in a traditional aspect, eating sweet potatoes and cranberries and stuffing and all the trappings of Thanksgiving and then get on a treadmill the next day extra long, I'm happy.

You know, no matter what I am or what I do for a living, I'm still, you know, the husband and the dad and the protector of the house, and I have to be conscientious about that.

It's odd the things that people remember. Parents will arrange a birthday party, certain it will stick in your mind forever. You'll have a nice time, then two years later you'll be like, 'There was a pony there? Really? And a clown with one leg?'

I go to the movies at least five times a week, and after a while everything becomes a blur to me.

The humor section is the last place an author wants to be. They put your stuff next to collections of Cathy cartoons.

When I look at a lot of older stuff that I've written, I think one sign of amateur humor writing is when you see people trying too hard.

I miss my dad, yes. But I try to honor his memory, as well as all the victims of Hurricane Katrina, through the love I have for all humanity, a love I try to express through my music.

I worked at an ice cream parlor called Chadwicks. We wore old-timey outfits and had to bang a drum, play a kazoo, and sing 'Happy Birthday' to people while giving them free birthday sundaes. Lots of ice cream scooping and $1 tips.

Both conservatives and liberals watch 'Parks and Recreation,' and they each think the show is for them, which is really cool. 'SNL' was totally different. It was exciting because everyone was paying attention. Political humor works when people know what you're talking about.

When I had a job catering, I catered a wedding for the Smashing Pumpkins bassist in Indiana. And I served Billy Corgan shrimp off a tray.

There's something so romantic about being broke in New York. You gotta do it. You have to live there once without any money, and then you have to live there when you have money. Let me tell you, of the two, the latter is far better.

As you navigate through the rest of your life, be open to collaboration. Other people and other people's ideas are often better than your own. Find a group of people who challenge and inspire you, spend a lot of time with them, and it will change your life.

In a recent Valentine's Day posting on her fan website, Britney Spears says that - oh, who cares?

I just love bossy women. I could be around them all day. To me, bossy is not a pejorative term at all. It means somebody's passionate and engaged and ambitious and doesn't mind leading.

Improvisation is almost like the retarded cousin in the comedy world. We've been trying forever to get improvisation on TV. It's just like stand-up. It's best when it's just left alone. It doesn't translate always on TV. It's best live.

Always remember your kid's name. Always remember where you put your kid. Don't let your kid drive until their feet can reach the pedals. Use the right size diapers... for yourself. And, when in doubt, make funny faces.

I had a birthday party with my family and friends at a house, and Chipotle catered. It was beautiful.

I think that most people who are just artists, who are getting famous, would trade a lot of their fame back for some normalcy, pretty much immediately.

You can't be a good actor if you get too affected by fame. Because then you're not real, and you're not really wanting more. You look at a lot of actors who, before they were famous, did a lot of amazing work, and once they got too big, it just got off.