Now, the essence, the very spirit of Christmas is that we first make believe a thing is so, and lo, it presently turns out to be so.

I detest life-insurance agents: they always argue that I shall some day die, which is not so.

Advertising: the science of arresting the human intelligence long enough to get money from it.

Men are able to trust one another, knowing the exact degree of dishonesty they are entitled to expect.

A half truth, like half a brick, is always more forcible as an argument than a whole one. It carries better.

Many a man in love with a dimple makes the mistake of marrying the whole girl.

It's called political economy because it is has nothing to do with either politics or economy.

It is to be observed that 'angling' is the name given to fishing by people who can't fish.

I am a great believer in luck, and I find the harder I work the more I have of it.

It takes a good deal of physical courage to ride a horse. This, however, I have. I get it at about forty cents a flask, and take it as required.

Personally, I would sooner have written Alice in Wonderland than the whole Encyclopedia Britannica.