People live too much of their lives on email or the Internet or text messages these days. We're losing all of our communication skills.

I have snakes, three sharks, moray eels, piranhas, five scorpions and a bird spider. All of them are predators. They are dangerous but it's cool to have strong and powerful pets.

We have freedom of speech, but you got to watch what you say.

The most romantic thing I ever did to my woman? I painted her toenails!

I'm a human being. I feel all emotions. I'm not just happy all the time. Sometimes, I'm sad and feel the blues. Sometimes I even want to feel the blues. Sometimes, you want to feel down.

On 'Saturday Night Live,' I never really wrote. You know, I would just - I would let the writers cast me into the show. So my strength - and I put all my energies into performance. I just couldn't deal with the rejection, you know, getting your sketches cut, and it was hard for me.

Everybody's out to get something from somebody. 'Gold diggers' doesn't just mean money, it can mean time, it can mean feelings. It can mean anything when you're taking and not giving. When people don't know how to reciprocate.

You can't hold me to the same standard as the president or a school teacher. I'm just a comedian. My job is like Archie Bunker.

I'm human, I feel, I understand. That's the highest level of love, is understanding - when you can understand someone, when you can love them with their flaws and their faults. So I understand, I consider. I may speak the truth, but I'll consider your feelings, too.

I do stand up sometimes out of anger. Sometimes the greatest stuff comes from a dark place.

Listen, Bruce Lee fought out of anger. That's why they call it the 'Fists of Fury.' Michael Jackson danced with fury. I do stand up out of fury. I'm not mad at anybody. I'm not mad at any human being because I'm a human being.

Being funny wasn't a career choice growing up, it was my way out of situations; a way to survive another day.

'Saturday Night Live' was like a university for funny.

My sense of humor is a turkey, and I pull it out of the oven and baste it in reality.

I want to show the world my humor.

If I had to describe my sense of humor, I would say it's contemporary wit, you know what I'm saying?

My father was the role model I looked up to. My dad was an entertainer, too. I patterned my life after him. He wanted me to do better than he did. He never sold a record in his life, but to me, he was still a rock star.

You get somebody to crack a smile, that's a beautiful thing.