I'd rather be a failure at something I love than a success at something I hate.

I honestly think it is better to be a failure at something you love than to be a success at something you hate.

At my age flowers scare me.

Happiness? A good cigar, a good meal, a good cigar and a good woman - or a bad woman; it depends on how much happiness you can handle.

I look to the future because that's where I'm going to spend the rest of my life.

Don't stay in bed, unless you can make money in bed.

I can't afford to die; I'd lose too much money.

I would go out with women my age, but there are no women my age.

When I was a boy the Dead Sea was only sick.

If you live to be one hundred, you've got it made. Very few people die past that age.

I spent a year in that town, one Sunday.